Yesterday sort of came and went with very little fanfare for myself (on being 30 days AF). Maybe because I have achieved this before, it didn’t have fireworks of celebration… But, I am pleased and I do not, by any means, belittle myself or anyone else this landmark moment. Without judging, I know that others around me struggle with this feat. But honestly, it felt easy and breezy for me this month.
I want to give a shout out to Annie Grace and her recently published book:
I made a commitment to myself to participate in the book and journal….for 30 days. Something different happened in this magical month. I shifted.
I do not care to drink today. I doubt very much that I will want to drink tomorrow. I believe I have been rewired.
WOW. What? Huh?
Yep, I feel like a different human being. It’s taken me a few rounds of sobriety, but today I feel like drinking alcohol just “simply does not make any sense” for me.
I’m not going to be brash or cocky about this. I want to recognize that there are tools I have picked up and put down these past few years. I have learned to use them as one uses to master other tools in their craft or trade. With time and effort, I have learned to be comfortable being sober.
I want to call out two tools:
Community Involvement. I made a commitment to connect with other AFers through blogs and online forums this past month. (I’m still off social media…but I did reactivate my twitter account).
Accountability Time Frames. 30 days… 100 days… 6 months…1 year….another year…a decade. I read recently that it doesn’t matter how long…just set another time hurdle for yourself. I’m setting my sites on the 100 Day marker = APRIL 30, 2019
On my last trip to the AF rodeo, I dropped these two tools. I stopped connecting with my community in June 2017 (life got busy-summer) and I didn’t really even keep track of landmarks. As a result, my brain tricked me into believing I could be a “moderate”. I am NOT a moderate. I believe that if I had logged on that morning to check in with my blogging community, I would have had intention and focus on the positive imprints of AF living. I slipped into old grooves in November. Just weeks shy of one year… (at the time wasn’t even thinking about a 1 year of AF living anniversary date). I just simply made a bad choice that evening. I actually didn’t even have the entire glass of champagne (that night)…but the door had been opened.
I need really “Bright Lines”. There is no wiggle room for this girl. I’ve proven too many times that…